What to do now that college football is over

Wow what an end to the college football season, the same two teams as last year’s title game in a thriller that went down to the wire. And best of all, Alabama didn’t win. But now that the college football season is over, what are you going to do with all that free time? I’m here to help you make that decision.

Watch college basketball

Can’t get enough of major universities and TV networks exploiting young men’s talents for massive profits? Well you’re in luck, because college basketball season is heating up! And just like college football, there’s about 5 or 6 teams who can realistically win it all! Conference play is just getting started, so if you’re an Alabama fan (they’re actually OK this year!) you can watch them take on Auburn or whoever else you might hate, but get more upset when they lose more games in a week than the football team does all season.

Drink

I mean, Trump takes office in what, 10 days? There’s no college football, it’s winter, and we all have that to look forward to. Maybe drinking is too low on this list.

Take up a hobby

Shit, maybe it’s working out or getting off the couch more, I mean, we did just spend the past four-and-a-half months spending every Saturday on the couch gorging ourselves on booze and tailgate food, sweating out some of that garbage may not be the worst thing.

Or if a workout isn’t your style, you can brew your own beer or something, maybe join a trivia league, go bowling, again it is winter, I don’t know what the hell there is to do in the winter other than be cold.

Talk to you family and loved ones

I have no idea, I’m running out of ideas here. I’m sure your parents and husband/wife would like to hear from you in some form that isn’t, “WHY DON’T THEY JUST RUN THE DAMN BALL!?” And know what’s going on in your life outside of football.

Take a vacation

Remember that part about how it’s winter? Yeah, fuck that, get on a plane or a boat and go somewhere warm for a few days. Maybe you’ll like it so much you’ll never come back and you’ll work as a bartender at some weird bamboo hut bar for the rest of your life. I’m sure some place is running a cheap deal on airfare and hotels in a tropical location right now. Just be sure to avoid making the trip during the mid-March to early April part when college kids and families are on spring break. Unless you have to drag your kids to one of those things.

Figure out how to watch football year-round

Hear me out on this, but it’s possible.

There’s still three-and-a-half weeks of the NFL season, which ends on Feb. 4 with the Super Bowl. Shortly after that, regional indoor football teams play exhibition games, then start their season for real in March. (For a list of teams that may be near you, google IFL, CIF, NAL, AFL, APF) It’s a surprisingly fun time in-person, is family friendly and affordable, and it’s always fun to see someone from Florida State and think, “Wait, that’s what happened to him? How’d he end up with the Carolina Destroyers?”

The Arena Football League starts in April and its season runs most of the summer, which then leads into the CFL season, which, like indoor football, is more fun than you think it is, and has plenty of famous American college players to keep you interested. That season lasts forever, and leads right back into the start of college football season.

Just repeat this process every year and you’ll never go without football again!

 

 

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