Michigan man blames chicken nuggets for drunk driving arrest

We head back to my home state for your weird Friday news update.

Ah chicken nuggets, when in a bind on a road trip or just wanting the least offensive thing you can eat in a hurry, they are always there for you.

Well, not only are they delicious and good for you, but one man in Michigan is claiming they can get you a drunk driving arrest!

According to MLive, a county commissioner in Montcalm, Michigan was arrested in December for an OWI, and when he was pulled over by the cops, offered up an interesting excuse.

The money quote:

Jeremy Miller, 40, was stopped for speeding and later arrested for operating while intoxicated after a breathalyzer test indicated he had a BAC of 0.14 percent.

Asked if he understood why he was being arrested, Miller told the arresting Greenville Public Safety officer it was “because I was being stupid, those damn chicken nuggets,” according to a police report.

That 0.14 is almost double the legal limit of 0.08, and he was apparently speeding, doing 58 in a 30.

Gotta love the guy for trying a new excuse and not denying that he had anything that might have gotten him drunk. But I really bet it was not the chicken nuggets.

If chicken nuggets were able to get you drunk, then McDonald’s, Burger King, Wendy’s and every other fast food place would have profits so high, we’d all be working there for $25/hr. Not to mention the lines would be out the door and into the street from all the people under 21 wanting to buy legally hidden alcohol.

Or, if prohibition is ever put in place again, we now know the first place to look for bootleggers.

Or maybe he is blaming the chicken nuggets for the DUI because they didn’t soak up the booze fast enough.

Or maybe he bought some of that Jack Daniels BBQ sauce and that got him turnt from dipping his nuggets in it too often. The world may never know.

Either way, well done Michigan man, thank you for the laugh.

Also, Hot Mustard is the GOAT dipping sauce for them, do not @ me because everything else is wrong.

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