Chick-fil-A aims to cash in on idiots by offering gluten-free buns

Chick Fil A

If you’re a liar who says you can’t have gluten, well today is your lucky day, because now you can ruin your body with fast food, gluten free!

Business Insider reported Monday morning that Chick-fil-A will now be offering gluten-free buns at locations across the country, because the gluten-free crowd was apparently clamoring for some drive-thru fried chicken sandwiches.

Now look, I know there are actually some people are allergic to gluten and it’s a major issue and big win for them to get this, but if you’re just cutting out gluten because it’s a diet trend, you’re an idiot.

From the Business Insider Article:

Its new bun is made with quinoa and amaranth and sweetened with molasses and raisins. It contains 150 calories and costs an additional $1.15.

First off, fast food is already over-priced, so Chick-fil-A is offering the chance to speed up your death to healthy people for only $1.15. Bargain! Now your meal will go from $8 to $9.15 all because you think you’re eating “healthier.”

Second, all of the things in this new bun…should not go in a sandwich bun. Quinoa? Nope. Amaranth? I think that’s a character in Lord of the Rings. Molasses? Ok, maybe I can see that so there is some flavor other than saw dust in this bun. But raisins?! GTFO. If I ever order a sandwich that has raisins in the bun, I’m taking it back and going somewhere else that doesn’t put raisins in their food.

So yeah, if you’re one of the one percent of Americans who actually is allergic to gluten, and you somehow still eat fast food, today is your lucky day.

 

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